I had take-out for dinner tonight.  While waiting for my food I heard this guy at the table next to me explaining to his buddies why drinking is healthy:

The American Indians hunted buffalo, but the buffalo populations never decreased.  This is because the Indians hunted only the weakest members of the herd.  As a result, the strongest buffalo were left to bred healthier buffalo with each passing generation.  The Indians knew that their hunting practice gave them everything they needed, and at the same time this kind of exploitation of resources was sustainable into the future.

When a person drinks he or she kills off millions of brain cells.  These cells are the weaker cells that don't function well and can screw up synaptic connections.  When they die off, there is more nourishment available for the strong and healthy brain cells.

That's why when you drink, you think you're smarter.