Article Image for: Top 10 Greatest Inventions I have an off-topic article now. Last night I saw a bunch of infomercials like Billy Mays's products or the Dyson vacuum cleaner. Then I thought about the toilet. What an invention. After all, could you imagine life without it. What about the fridge? What about the Internet, computers or electricity?

So here it is. My list of the top 10 greatest inventions of all time.

  1. The toilet. Amazing. Absolutely amazing. And those toilet brushes and extra strength plungers. #1 in my book.

  2. The fridge, especially the kind with ice dispensers. We'd waste a lot of money on food without this one.

  3. The computer and the Internet. I have to combine these 2 because on their own they're not much good to me. I can't imagine writing and researching without this dynamic combo.

  4. The clock. I'm always late for work even with this invention. But it's good for scheduling tee times.

  5. The printing press. Not much good today with the Internet around. But this invention and modern variations actually forced politicians to think more carefully about the stupid s*** they say.

  6. The microwaveable oven. Many college students swear by this invention.

  7. TV and HBO. I had to combine these 2 because I hate regular safe programming like Drew Carry on the Price Is Right and Desperate Housewhores. Add Hi-Def and Dolby Digital to the mix and you have some quality entertainment.

  8. Video games. Not just old Mario and Halo but everything in between. Imagine all of the school shootings that would occur without these great isolation wards.

  9. The phone. Forget faxes. Those suck. And forget those bluetooth headsets that make normal people walk around like babbling idiots looking like the cheese just slipped off their cracker. Textingis an overused waste of time. Why can't people just pick up the phone, say what they have to say and end it. A lot of social disorders and carpel tunnel freaks will be created thanks to that hobby.

  10. The car. Walking isn't what it used to be. Just look at the fat people rolling around in extra wide golf cart size wheel chairs and sleeping on bariatric tables. But the car is good for long distance and quick traveling. Like when you cut off your friend's foot and have to take him to the emergency room.
Unfortunately there are many inventions left off the top ten but can be found down the list between 11 and 20. That part of the list includes all of Billy Mays's products, the airplane, the electric guitar, breast implants, and the pooper scooper.

Does anyone have any disputes with my top 10? I'm open to suggestions.