I understand that Double A is writing a book.  That got me to thinking.  I considered writing a book myself some years ago, but nothing ever came of it.  Maybe I should go ahead and give it a try. 

 

Let me explain.  We moved to AZ back in 1991, at the zenith of Papa Bush’s economic achievement.  I was out of work, and we came here and stayed with relatives while I searched the dry desert of the Bush economy for a job that was more elusive than a drink from an artesian spring in the Sanoran desert.   

  

They had four dogs and we had three.  The back yard was occupied by a pool, and the pooch poop piled up rather fast in the small grassy area.  Part of my contribution to the communal situation was to keep the poop scooped between job search forays.   

  

Well, over the months of unemployment in Papa Bush’s economy, I became quite adept at poop patrol.  And, I gradually picked up pointers and developed techniques that I thought might make a small book – something like “1000 Things You Can Do With a Dead Cat”, a book you may remember that hit the best seller list briefly some years back.  Not exactly a classic, but it filled a niche. 

  

One thing I learned early in the game is that when flipping turds ( got pretty good at tossing the s*** into the bucket) one should never absent mindedly let one’s jaw go slack.  In other words keep your mouth shut with vigilant determination. 

   

And you would be surprised how many different types of poop there are.  In a dog yard, I mean.  Consistency, size, shape, color, state of disintegration, and so on all have a bearing on how you flip the stuff, or even if you flip it at all.  

  

I would have to try and recall all the finer nuances of flipping the s***.  It has been almost two decades since Papa Bush put the economy in the toilet.  But I had quite a collection of elements and techniques at the time, enough for four or maybe even five chapters.  

  

It has dawned on me that here we are again – another fine mess.  But under Bush Jr. the economy gurgling down the drain is just one part of it, although if you listen to him everything is hunky dory.   

   

Maybe I should get busy and write the book after all.  There is infinitely more s*** flying around today then there was under Bush Sr.  I could give some good advice, starting with "Don’t let your jaw drop in 'shock and awe' at the size of the lunkers when Jr. is busy flipping the s***".